• Louise Mullins


Updated: Jun 24

This book is close to my heart for three reasons: the three abusive men I dated. Which is why when I saw the book written by a father whose daughter was murdered by her abusive partner I had to feature it on my blog. If discovering this heart-breaking and honest book doesn't save one persons life, reading it will. It's a brutal reflection of the pain and devastation wrought by intimate partner violence and I feel humbled at being able to share it with you.

I managed to break free but, unfortunately, many people do not. Relationships that involve Domestic abuse NEVER start out that way. In fact you often feel like you've met your soulmate, that you cannot believe it took you so long to find your other half, the person you want to spend the rest of your life with, whom you feel you've known forever, and who listens to you, understands you, makes you feel special and who seems to adore you. They buy you gifts and ply you with compliments. That's because they're charming you, something called love-bombing. Making you feel as if you cannot remember a life without them. it's so you'll begin to rely on them for your emotional security, and then depend on them financially or physically because they use the love-bombing to manipulate you into thinking you can't cope without them (termed co-dependency). That way, when they suggest you stay with them for a romantic night in instead of going out with your mates or to that family do your mum planned, you go along with it. Days become weeks become months become years and you end up alone, lonely, isolated. You've no income because they've suggested you stay home so they take the brunt of working and bringing money into the home they suggested you move into with them. You have sex with them when they instigate it and even when you don't feel like it because they emotionally abuse you by calling you frigid if you don't feel like doing it with the man who punched you in the face earlier for daring to question why he spent the petrol money you need to get the kids to school tomorrow with in the pub. Before you know it you haven't cooked a meal yourself in years, bought the food you have to eat in just as long, or had any kind of life outside your singular household that no longer feels like home but more like a prison. So you flee. That's when he decides that if he can't have you, no one can. The most dangerous time is when you've left. I survived. Now I'm thriving. This book is for anyone concerned about domestic abuse, or a family member, or friend, or even themselves.


When Dating Hurts is the breath-taking memoir of the dating violence murder of a daughter.

In June 2005, Kristin Mitchell was killed by her ex-boyfriend 20 days after her college graduation. Kristin’s family was faced with a decision: concentrate on healing themselves—or take their experience and help others who might face a similar situation. When Dating Hurts is a detailed account of what the Mitchell family learned the hard way beginning with a call from detectives.

Readers see how dating violence can seize any family in any community. Besides detailing a tragedy, this book offers sound advice gained from domestic violence counsellors, law enforcement professionals, and dating violence survivors. Had The Mitchells read a book like this, they are sure Kristin would be alive today.

Parents should read it for the sake of their daughters, or a sister, a niece, a friend, or a co-worker. Read it and share what you learn because 1 in 3 women will suffer severe physical violence at the hands of an intimate partner in their lifetimes. It typically happens between the ages of 16-24, but it can happen at any age.

The Mitchell family is certain that reading When Dating Hurts will save a few innocent young women. Let this book help someone you care about.

You can buy your eBook or paperback copy HERE

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